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Why I Have a Bed Time

by ESA


Certain times I feel as if I’m alone

Especially during the night

I try to write

It out

It’s like I’m underwater and I can’t breathe

Like something is pulling on me

Like I’m chained to something and cannot move

I cry for help yet

No words come out

Tears roll down my face

For a minute I forget my place

Who I am

Where I am

It makes no sense

It isn’t fair

I don’t know this feeling or how to lose it

That is why I don’t stay up during the night

That is a feeling I can’t fight

I am not strong enough

I don’t tell anyone because I hate that attention

I hate how often I feel this way

And that’s exactly why I go to sleep at 11 pm.